Responses From Our Community
Question From a Friend
“My friend recently had an unexpected DNA discovery and seems consumed by finding answers. I want to be supportive, but I don't fully understand why knowing everything feels so important.”
The reflections below were shared by members of our community in response to this question. Each response represents one person's lived experience and should not be interpreted as speaking for everyone who shares that experience.
Responses are shared anonymously unless the contributor requested otherwise. Some may have been lightly edited for spelling, punctuation, grammar, or length without changing the meaning of the contributor's words.
I would tell this friend to just be supportive, to not make any assumptions about the NPE friends feelings, to not say things just for the sake of trying to make NPE friend feel better (ex: “your dad is still your dad”, “nothings changed”, etc.). That your NPE friend will feel all the emotions & they may switch frequently & that’s all valid. Be a great listener, JUST listen. Encourage NPE friend to share their emotions/feelings/struggles judgement free. Try to help NPE friend find support groups on social media, help NPE friend find a therapist, help NPE friend with their search if they need help. Be patient!! Your friends identity dramatically shifted overnight & there is bound to be some really difficult times…just standby & be support.
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